A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work.
Over the next 5 weeks, I will be covering my top 5 successful habits of single mothers. I wanted to do one post, but I realize I had too much to say and I didn’t want you to fall asleep reading my post. So one habit at a time.
I may also, recommend reading resources that may help strengthen any habit you already have or want to adopt.
When it comes to mothering while single, how does one define success? Can we measure success by how well our children behave? Or can we measure that success by how emotionally balanced those children grow up to be?
Well, those are complicated questions with no doubt equally complicated answers. This post is not, however, about the impact of single motherhood on children. What I would like to address is what are the habits, from my point of view and experience, that allow a mom to successfully navigate raising children alone.
Below is one of the lessons I have learned from mothering while single over the past 18 years.
Habit 1: Start Each Day Anew.
What I mean is that I learned the hard way not to bring yesterday’s doubts and fears into today’s restless arena. And forget about tomorrow — it doesn’t exist. Today brings enough of its own challenges that need our attention. For example, slamming the door in anger becomes your teenager’s latest hobby. Or you need to buy grocery but the $50 in the bank is hardly enough.
Thinking or worst, worrying about the fact that the car needs new tires and you still don’t have enough money to replace them, won’t change anything. It drains you of much needed energy. It distracts you from finding solutions to immediate issues.
So you lay in bed paralyzed from fear that 10 days from now the landlord is going to come knocking. At the end of the day you realize you forgot to cook and the kids are home from school hungry. Dinner not done and rent situation didn’t change. And now you feel even more awful because now you have to give the kids cereal AGAIN for dinner.
Peace of mind comes from taking care of the immediate things. Period.
I believe this one habit was helpful to me in staying focused. It took many years before I develop this habit. And I’m still learning. This one habit could make mothering while single a bit more enjoyable.
Maybe.. even a tiny bit.
“You are the God who sees me…” (Gen 16:13) NIV.
Recommended Reading: The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod.